Richmond, Virginia

Richmond, Virginia, is the place where Violate Lacey endured an abusive first marriage, where her son Robert killed her husband while defending her, and from which Robert and Violate left by separate routes. Recalled by Violate as she tells Lizzy about her past, the city holds together domestic violence, the restrictions placed on women, and the secret arrangements that made escape possible.

Violate Lacey’s Life in Richmond

Violate says she came from Richmond, where she lived with her first husband and Robert when he was a child. Her husband was many years older than she was, considered her wanton because she enjoyed life, and was very religious; he also often raised his hand to her. The respectable social world around them did not offer Violate an easy way out. As she explains it, a proper lady did not run away or speak openly about such matters, and she believed she had no right to take Robert from the household. She endured the marriage for years while maintaining a good appearance and raising him.

Robert’s Intervention and His Father’s Death

As Robert grew older, he repeatedly tried to intervene when his father struck Violate. His efforts brought beatings upon him as well. When Robert was nearly sixteen, his father began beating Violate especially badly, and Robert came to her defense. During the confrontation, Violate’s husband drew a gun to keep Robert away; the two struggled over it, and the husband was killed. Violate cannot say whether the gun went off accidentally or Robert fired deliberately. Her account leaves that question unresolved, while making clear that Robert’s intervention ended in his father’s death.

Concealment and Departure

Violate had met Lieutenant Colonel Robert Lacey, a widower she describes as kind, at a social gathering in Richmond. After the killing, she sent a trusted servant to fetch him. He did not turn Robert over to the authorities: instead, he arranged for the boy to leave town on the first train going north. He also made it appear that Violate’s husband had been shot in a brawl at one of Richmond’s gambling establishments, where the man was known to spend time. The account distinguishes that cover story from what happened at home: the killing occurred during the struggle over the gun, not in a gambling-house fight.

Violate then went west with Robert Lacey, while Robert had already been sent north. The departure from Richmond thus did not reunite mother and son; it separated them as a means of protecting him. Violate’s recollection makes the city more than a point of origin: it is where social expectations helped keep abuse unspoken, and where escape depended on secrecy and a carefully constructed account of a death.